It was colder than when I usually awake up before, when daddy pick me up with both arms from mah bed an’ curried me out of mah room to the outside. I rub my eyes with mah fists an’ aks’im “Daddy where we going?” an’he said “Hush babe.” He grabbed my slippers wit me still in his arms an’ set me right in fron’a the door an’ I aks agin’ “Daddy where we going?” The sky was still purple an’ the sun ain’t over the mountains yit, but he made me put’em, on anyhow. “Daddy why do we gotta git to work so early daddy?” An he din’t answer, just grabbed hold’a my hand and we started walkin’ down the path away from home. He looked straight on toward the ocean an’ din’t say a thing, looked like he was gunna yell o’ getting ready to say a prayer and we kept on walkin’. I yawned and kept rubbin’ my eye with my left hand. (I think the semicolon takes away from the authentic tone the story is written in)I looked back over my shoulder at our house and the master’s house and the whole ranch as we finally hit the road (highway refers to something too modern for this story), crossed it, and wonderin’ why daddy ain’t waked them up so early in the mornin’. I looked up at his tall face an’ his bottom lip stuck out more den usual so I laughed a lil’ bit an’ he finally looked down at me wit big eyes an’ a stare I ain’t even seen on’im before, made me stop gigglin’. Well we make it across the road and past the dunes on the path that led to the beach an’ the sky was a lighter purple den before and the moon was a little ways closer to the horizon an’ daddy ain’t said nothin’ yet. We walked along the sand an’ my Daddy started hummin’, hummin a song he hums when he’s about to start workin’ or about to run the carriage into town or after he prays and gits in bed with Mama. Then he mumbled a bunch of words, and I could only make out ever couple ones with waves in my head. We walked the seashore till finally the moon was into the ocean an’ the mountains started to turn from black to brown, and things around us started gettin’ orange. We curved around a cliff up a flight of stairs that the master had Daddy build into the dunes, up and back to the road. We walked along the roadside when all a’sidden Daddy stopped and crouched down an’ he finally smiled, started puttin’ my strayed hairs behind my ears with one’a his big ol’ hands an’ his eyes turned red an’ he told me “You stay here, little girl, I’m walkin’ down this here road alone.” I tugged at my white nightie wit my hands and said “What you mean, Daddy?” an’ he replied, “You see there’s a heaven awaiting me, my child, to play into the nights and days, so don’t you weep girl, don’t you cry.” He got back up on his legs and started walkin’ away an’ I begin to worry but I stood there like he told me an’ I wailed out “but Daddy, kitten needs a feedin…an’, an’ so do the pigs an’ black dog, an’ brother Lucas an’ the baby too-“ an’ he says to me, “I know it’s up there baby, an’ when you grow up, real strong, when you grow tall we’ll meet again, baby, an’ I’ll see you.” An’ he turned away. I watched him until he got smaller. I watched the pink of his hands until they stopped swaying, I watched the stitches on his jeans( perhaps call his pants ‘trousers’ or another similar word to fit into the time period) fade and the holes in his back pockets disappear until he was only a black shadow in the distance, on the road. Mah knees began to shake, an’ I worked hard to keep my stomach from comin’ out and I squeezed my eyes real tight to keep the tears from fallin’, an’ the fields around me an’ the sand on the beach and the hay in the roads an’ the mountains were yellow now an’ it was morning an’ I know the master’d be up an’ orderin by the time the sun got over the mountains an’ behind the home, so I took my self back the other way up the road through the field on the dirt path, past all the crickets an’ birds an’ flowers growin’, past the chicken coop and the pigs pens an’ the tractor, an’ the cows that needed milkin’ an’ the chickens feedin’ an’ the weeds a’pullin, an’ the master’d be up by the time that mean ol’ sun hit just over the mountains an’ behind the home. An’ brother, kitten, baby, an’ the dog too. I walked past the pillars, into the quarters where Mama lay dreamin’ still so I shook her with mah two hands so she let outta noise like a puppy an’ rolled away from me and I shook her harder from behind an’ I say, “Wake up! Wake up, Mama, don’t you sleep so hard!” an’ she yawns an’ rolls over an’ opens her eyes right to left an’ says “Heaven almighty, child! It ain’t time yet!” and yawns agin an’ I says “Old man is gone, Mama” an’ she waked and sat up with big eyes at me, real open, an’ says “What you mean baby, what are you talking?””Old Man told me the blues is like the ocean an’ to think of it when I’m alone, then he kissed my head said he’d see me in heaven an’ then he walked the road.” My throat started hurtin’ an’ my mama grabbed me to her bosom and begins to cry out real loud an’ I can’t hardly breathe until my eyes are leaking into her night dress and she yells, “Oh baby, my babies! I knew this day would come!”
This is a part of Thus Spoke Zarathustra...
ON THE TARANTULAS
Behold, this is the hold of the tarantula. Do you want to see the tarantula itself? Here it hangs; touch it, that it tremble! There it comes willingly: welcome tarantula! your triangle and symbol sits black on your back; and I also know what sits in your soul. Revenge sits in your soul wherever you bite, black scabs grows; your poison makes the soul whirl with revenge.
Thus I speak to you in a parable- you who make souls whirl, you preachers of equality. to me you are tarantulas, and secretly vengeful. But I shall bring your secrets to light; therefore I laugh in your faces with my laughter of the heights. Therefore I tear at your webs, that your rage may lure you out of your lie-holes and your revenge may leap out from behind your word justice. for that man be delivered from revenge, that is for me the bridge to the highest hope, and a rainbow after long storms.
The tarantulas, of course, would have it other wise.
No comments:
Post a Comment